AWESOME INTERVIEW WITH AMELIA CRY TIL I DIE

So if you’ve been a reader of mine, you might remember that in September I became obsessed with Amelia Cry Til I Die’s 2022 record “high on my own supply.” As a fellow trans person and artist, I was just so struck by the rawness of the lyrics and the recordings. Really really amazing stuff. You can check out my full review of that record here. Anywho, I reached out to Amelia Swain, leader of the project, who said she would be down to get interviewed. After sending a few emails back and forth over the course of a few months, I winded up with a hand-typed letter at my doorstep today. What a privilege and honor. The interview is so awesome, so read on.

Transcription:

Q. What are your influences?

Amelia Cry Till I Die: My first big influence growing up was Avril Lavigne. When I was 13 my family moved to tokyo, and i remember being in a guitar store in Ochanomizu, the ‘guitar district’ .. I used to go there on weekends with my friends. We would take turns playing all the crazy guitars. Anyways, it was in the back of the shop, on a little tv against the stairs, it was a dvd playing of an avril lavigne concert. i stood there, transfixed. the songs were SO good, she looked SO cool, she had such confidence and style, and her voice was literally incredible.. I stood there, in the shop, and I wanted to be her so bad, it literally hurt. I kinda knew thats all I ever wanted, to write and play songs, and really rockout and be emotional and open, and to own it and wear cool clothes with long hair. i mean even now i still love her. i still want to be her.

In 2016 and 2017 i was listening to frankie cosmos every day, the album ‘affirms glinting.’ frankie cosmos gave me so much, i learned all of her songs. she showed me how to write about the moments of your day. to access your own voice. to not have everything figured out. to just be real in a song.

Q. What is your creative process like?

Amelia Cry Til I Die: I spend a lot of time in my room playing guitar. Im super emotional and i get really affected by stuff in my life. idk i just love playing and singing and making up little songs. if im angry and distressed, i can try to make my guitar sound like that.. or if im sad and needing something hopeful i can try to play that too. i write things i struggle to say in real life. I’m really bad at speaking up for myself so im always writing lyrics to express things i keep buried. i wish i could be more direct in my lyrics, but im always really cryptic and impressionistic. Im so scared of saying the truth so i always hide it in a song. its a bad habit.

Q. What is the Philly music scene like?

Amelia Cry Til I Die: I only know a certain pocket of the west philly queer/trans scene. But philly is huge, theres so many bands and people you could live your whole life and never see half of them.

Everyones got their own approach, their own vibe, aesthetic. Bands come through on tour and local bands sandwich them, at a house or basement, or Abyssinia Upstairs, or Johnny Brendas. In the diy scene its common for all Door money to go to touring bands. Im told other cities dont do this typically but i think its great when a touring band walks away with 100 to 200 dollars. People often wear masks. The scene is predominantly white;..

Ive noticed bands put a lot of care and attention to their projects. things are rarely half assed. audiences will listen attentively, quietly, between sets everyone goes into the backyard to smoke cigs and joke around.

youll probably see your crush.

you get to see your favorite band play and its awesome. its the best music ive ever heard, seeing Brittle Brian play, or Soup Dreams. it will change your life. I dont know what i would do without this scene. going to a show makes you wanna start your own band. theres not really a central place to find out about shows, i wish there was. usually people post on instagram, or you just hear about them from a friend.

One day Id love to run my own venue. during the day i’ll record bands and at night we’ll do shows. maybe it would be a house and bands can sleep there on tour. thats honestly my dream.

i love philly so much. i never want to leave. everyone is the nicest funniest kindest people youll ever meet. i feel so spoiled. soo lucky. the scene has been everything to me. i really feel like i belong here.

:’) thank you Amelia. everyone go listen to the music.

xx, syd